I walked into a store today, the type that I usually like to shop in, and just wanted to leave. I had no desire to shop at all. I decided that I would most likely never go to that store again. Not sure what is going on! I’m not sure why this occurred, or if I’ll stick with that decision. I’m a bit down today. This is the day that Tiff and I went to Scottsdale for the day to give Hannah a day off from us. About one o’clock I just started feeling really down and discouraged. I felt depressed for no apparent reason. I am just not sure why this mood hit me so suddenly while out on a day’s excursion that I have been looking forward to.
We, Tiff and I, had been talking about how central food has always been to our lives. It seems like no matter what you do, or where you go, food is a central part of the day. We aren’t as focused on food today as we may have been a few weeks ago and we weren’t hungry at the time. Is there such a thing as “food depression”? Could it be that food has always been so central to my life that I am pining that loss? The food that we are eating now is much more nourishing, but maybe not as enjoyable to me as my old types of food? I don’t know what is happening with me in this area. I have had bouts of depression off and on in my life, but as a rule, I am not depressed.
Several years ago, I visited with a young woman from our church. She was very down. A short time into our visit she told me that her life no longer had joy. When I asked her what had changed, she said that she had given up all fast food and soda the week before. She actually said, “my life has no joy right now”. I had a hard time relating to that statement, but now I think that I understand how she felt. I don’t view my life as having no joy, but I believe that there is a mental withdrawal that we go through with a big change like this. It’s also a dangerous time. Today, more than other days in the last week or two, I have thought about cheating on this diet and eating meat. I haven’t, and won’t because Tiff may follow my lead, but I sure did want to. At least today I did. Hopefully this will pass and tomorrow will be better and I won’t feel as down.
Scottsdale is a great place to visit. It’s a lovely and bustling city not too far from Phoenix. We walked all around historic Scottsdale. We went into all kinds of shops and took pictures of some landmarks. It was a bit crowded, but not too bad. We had beautiful weather for this type of outing – not too hot.
We are off to the grocery store again for juicing stuff. Tiff is really good at looking up vegan foods and recipes to try – most of them have been very good. They have ingredients that I don’t normally keep in the house, but I have a feeling that my pantry will be much different from this point on.
We did have another landmark today – a small one, but one non the less. Due to weak legs Tiff has avoided stairs. I also have had weak legs; I didn’t avoid stairs but did not relish climbing them. Today we came across a 2nd level retail shop and I decided that it was time that we take on climbing stairs. It went very well. We both have more strength in our legs and the climbs up and down went very smoothly.
Day 24 is done, day 25 is on the way. “People who love to eat are always the best people” – Julia Child